Saturday, September 24, 2011

Bible Study

Because I am an atheist, I have decided to do the right thing and read my Bible every day - as all good atheists should. Of course, being very devout I have already read the Bible through from beginning to end, but that was the Revised Standard Version. This time I decided to read the real Holy Version - you know the one - The King James Authorised Version. If it wasn't the real pucker Holy Bible it wouldn't be "authorised" would it, I mean you wouldn't authorize one that wasn't Holy would you? Of course, when you read it and you read all the "thees, thys and verilys", you just know its Holy; with language like that, well it just couldn't be anything else, could it?

Well, I 've not read a great deal yet, I'm about two thirds of the way through Exodus. Of course, everything I have read so far all makes perfect sense, like God killing all the Egyptian's cattle and livestock, and then killing them all again with hail mixed in with fire. Given they were all dead already, it takes a really Holy God to kill them all again. To be twice dead must surely be a great miracle. Strange that you don't read about the RSPCA getting involved, but then if they all decided the mass murder of all these dead already cattle was the work of a Holy God, then I suppose they would have decided to take a back seat on this one!

Of course, the Holy God of the Holy Bible is really very kind and loving - the same yesterday, today and forever - Helleluia!! He really showed his loving kindness to Pharaoh as every time he seemed minded to let the Israelites go, God hardened his heart and changed his mind again - just so that He could punish him and his poor hapless people all the more (and kill all the cattle twice), so that after a variety of plagues, God deploys His mastercard of killing all the first born of Egypt, not just people mind, oh no, but the cattle as well (offspring of twice-dead cattle - another miracle!). This loving kindness of God is staggering. Of course, if it was God who "hardened the heart" of Pharaoh, then it wasn't really Pharaoh's fault. He was just unfortunate in that by a cruel accident of birth he was not born into the chosen people of the Israelites. He couldn't help himself, and neither would any of us with such a kind and loving God pulling our strings and making us bad!

Oh well, I suppose God moves in mysterious ways.......Good job it's only fiction!